Four Ways of Building Loving Relationships and Healthy Marriages
Written by: Steve Knight
All healthy marriages must begin with a solid foundation built from love, trust, communication, companionship, and intimacy in order to thrive. All too often married couples find themselves forgetting what brought them together in the first place, taking one another for granted, and getting lost in the drudgery of everyday life.
Fortunately, with a bit of effort and a lot of patience from both parties, it's possible to once again have a loving, fulfilling bond with your spouse whether you've been married for only a year or two, or for several decades. The following four tips outline what all relationships need to maintain, or evolve into lasting, healthy marriages that will stand the test of time.
1. Building Strong Communication Skills
Without strong communication skills, no relationship will ever have a fighting chance at survival. Couples need to make it a point to share their thoughts openly and honestly instead of turning a deaf ear or keeping their feelings bottled up inside. When one spouse seems to have closed themselves off from the relationship, a divide inevitably forms that will only widen over time. Resentment builds and each spouse then feels alone and out of touch with the other.
Mixed messages and misunderstandings are usually to blame for a lack of communication as married couples often tend to assume their partners should automatically know how they feel, or know what they're really trying to say. Make a conscious effort to hear what you're saying during an argument or discussion, note the tone of voice and the type of words you use, as well as your facial expressions and body language, both of which have the ability to completely contradict what you're saying. Also, get into the habit of using sentences that begin with "I" as opposed to "You" so it's clear you aren't placing blame, but are merely trying to convey your feelings.
2. Being Trustworthy and Reliable
Equally as important as communicating with each other is being trustworthy and reliable to a fault. This requires one to say what they mean, and also really and truly mean what they say at all times. Healthy marriages must have unshakable faith and trust in addition to love and affection, otherwise, jealousy, anger and resentment are sure to develop, suffocating any positive remaining aspects of the relationship.
3. Having Empathy
Putting yourself in another person's shoes, so to speak, is definitely easier said than done. However, in a marriage, it's imperative to see things from the other's perspective, and not allow your own feelings or ideas to overpower your spouse's. Instead of allowing stubbornness to rule your thinking, step back for a moment and really see things from your partner's point of view.
4. Having Separate Interests
There's no law that says married couples must do absolutely everything together in order to maintain loving, healthy marriages. Spend time away from each other on occasion to hone your own interests and in turn, have something different to contribute to the marriage. Each of you is a unique individual, with their own way of thinking and doing things, most of which is what drew you to one another in the first place.
Healthy marriages require two separate people, each investing a large part of themselves to make the relationship meaningful and worthwhile. A marriage should never cause a person to compromise who they are or lose their true identity, instead, it should cultivate and heighten each spouse's own sense of self, causing couples to grow even closer, strengthening the deep and powerful bond of love.
